The 31st October is a special time for Serge and I, not because it is Halloween, but because it marks a year since we got engaged.
Tonight I want to dedicate this blog to what an amazing man my husband is – the sacrifices he has made for our love and all the joy that he brings to my life.
As a very wise woman (Rebecca Sparrow) said to me, not everyone is lucky enough to find a Great Love in his or her lifetime. Although my lifetime may be short, I am so very lucky that Serge arrived when I needed him most.
A few months ago, in one of my first blog posts (it actually took 3 posts to cover it!), I shared our love story (you can find it here, here and here), so I won’t bore you with the sickening, lovey dovey, vom-in your-mouth details of our relationship. But, as a quick summary, Serge and I ‘officially’ started dating in August 2013 – the week I was diagnosed with Stage 3 Melanoma. We were then engaged after finding out I had Stage 4 melanoma, and married in March after moving our wedding forward two months with the fear that I may not make our original May wedding (talk about being thrown into the deep end).
I bet you are already thinking that Serge is pretty amazing!
There are not many 24-year-old men that would have the maturity to choose to stay with someone in my situation, let a lone someone they had only known a few months.
Over the last 16 months of knowing each other, we have thrown ourselves into this relationship completely and with our whole hearts. We have experienced more than what most couples would experience in a lifetime.
In the last 16 months, like most couples (but hurried), we have had to learn how our relationship works. We have learnt the rhythms of each other’s moods (especially mine). We have learnt to read each other in times of sadness and know when the other person needs comfort. We have learnt to apologise. But, most of all we have learnt to celebrate. We have learnt to celebrate every occasion big or small and every win. Hence, tonight we will celebrate a year since our engagement.
Serge has chosen to be with someone that cannot promise him a future. Someone that can’t promise him a family. And, for this, I want to thank him.
I want to thank him for being by my side at every appointment and every treatment (even if he is playing on the iPad the whole time).
I want to thank him for being my best friend.
I want to thank him for the courage he gives me to fight.
I want to thank him for his patience.
Serge and I continue to live out our wedding vows each and every day (they were stolen from the front of a card!). We chose these vows because they focused on the 'everyday', not our uncertain future.
My wish for you is comfort on difficult days, smiles when sadness intrudes, rainbows to follow the clouds, laughter to kiss your lips, sunsets to warm your heart, hugs when spirits sag, beauty for your eyes to see, friendships to brighten your being, faith so that you can believe, confidence for when you doubt, courage to know yourself, patience to accept the truth, love to complete your life.
Serge and my love is something that many people hope for. A love that has seen the hardest of times. Although at some point we will be separated physically, our love will live on always and forever. And as my literary hero says,
Piglet: How do you spell love?
Pooh: You don’t spell it, you feel it.
I do not believe in a God, but I do believe that Serge was sent to me for a reason. He came into my life when I needed him most. I am so lucky that I get to spend my last ‘however long’ with such a wonderful man. I know that our love will always be felt, by not only us, but everyone that knows us.